Full to Bursting

I feel like I'm about to explode!  I've got so many emotions jumbled up and rumbling around inside that I just know it means something wonderful is changing within me.

Every negative day has a positive outcome, something I learn or take away from it.

And, more importantly, I am having fantastic days!  Day in which I feel good - like myself again.  Confident, clever, pretty, and full of win.  I am no longer second-guessing myself every minute of every day.  I'm worrying less, and laughing more.  I'm listening to music and bopping.  My smiles are becoming contagious.

And I know that whatever happens, however things turn out, I am a worthwhile person.

~Dorkopotamus (aka Katy)

Untitled

Like grasping at water, I could not close
My fists tight enough amidst the onslaught
To compress a reflection. Here, I froze,
Trapped within the very confines I sought.

Every pinprick was a bell toll sounding
The minute come hour coming undone.
I crumpled, over nothing, surrounding
Myself with echoes of my frustration.

What is come undone resolves and unblurs
The carousel - each animal now free
To wander. But freedom can be a curse;
More walls cultivate the sanctuary.

Therein lies the calm, but too calms the lies.
Muffled by echoes, I’m deaf to my cries.

~Dorkopotamus (aka Katy)

Learninating the Peasants

So for the past month I've done a lot of thinking, educating, learning, and self-affirming.  And I feel like I'm at once becoming a whole new person, and rediscovering a person inside that I'd forgotten all about.

Yeah, it's kinda confusing.

But awesome.  And I've got wonderful support all around me that's helping me through it.

I know the outcome of all this change will be good, and that's really exciting.

I'm beginning to realize that I'm actually pretty darn amazing. 

Why didn't I allow myself to know this sooner?

~Dorkopotamus (aka Katy)