Here's the thing...its good to be a dreamer. My new goal - to be happier where i am (as previously mentioned) BUT not giving up on my dreams. And i've got them - all be it small and plain...I have dreams and i'll never let them go. They involve my family seeing my kids grow...though they grow a little bit more each day - and this seems less and less likely - i refuse to accept the notion that my kids will grow up without their families. Of course, this is their reality and part of being happy is learning that some things wont change (and both sets of grandparents work so very hard to keep us close, even from a distance. So really, im v. lucky). My parents used to asked me to move closer to them...though they would never move closer to me at the expense of their happiness or comfort or well being. Im not upset with them - I get it. They LOVE where they live and couldn't imagine leaving it - especially for CO. It doesn't fit them. NC doesn't fit me, and truthfully Buffalo doesn't quite either. I am sad though that there is no middle ground.
So I'm here and they're there. and No one is coming this way and we're not going that way.............but............but...............
but i hold onto my dreams. And i always will. In my head - those dearest to me are just down the road. And we BBQ and shop for Christmas trees and go to the farmer's market and they stand up and clap at my kids graduations and there is someone there to hold my hand when im feeling alone and sad...
but then in my dreams the sun shines, i have friends that just drop by, my husband is home with me and the kids, and every weekend is an adventure.
It's good to have dreams - never stop dreaming.
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